No me= No imagined outcomes

When we are in an authentic process of embodiment, there occurs a rather strange phenomenon- we begin to lose our projected future.

You see, all future is imagined. And it is imagined by a "me"- an individual that imagines a nice future, or imagines a possible scary future. This "me" holds onto hopes, and fears like a sailor holds onto the ship that is going down. And if that drive within the "me" is still strong enough, it will do whatever it takes to keep that ship afloat.

Because when we are living a life for Truth, our "me" is the ship. And all the "me's" hopes and imagined outcomes belong on the ship. And the ship is all we have ever known. On that ship, we've imagined all kinds of outcomes, and then thought that we needed to do something to make those outcomes a reality. We've believed we were the captain of that ship, and even though the ship is going down, we still believe only in that ship.

This is how all those old functions within our belief systems relate to this life. We still think it is our life- and that it needs to turn out a certain way, according to what we imagine. These are outcomes. And they are going away.

Everyone is going to go through this process differently, but it is essential that we begin to recognize what imagination is doing, and how the "me" is holding out for its hopes, or is afraid of Life because of its fears. It will continue to do so, until- through our devotion to Truth, we sense in ourselves the falseness of it. Anywhere the "me" is trying to land is only imagination at work.

Truth is pure potential, and by remaining in the fire of not-knowing- all those outcomes are being removed. We- as consciousness- are accessing the fertile ground of that potential. And our minds can never imagine what that can look like. This is a big clue. But we can sense when we are in that fertile ground, because we have let the ship go down, and felt ourselves as the vast sea. No-where to land, because the "person" that needs a place has simply gone away.

A Clean Slate

What a strange dance this is. For these past few months, there has been very little movement to put myself out there, other than the meetings that I have scheduled. Instead there is an intuitive knowing that the drive to "make happen," is being completely removed. And those drives, as a teacher, would be to write blogs, post things on social media, put out newsletters, etc.

Yet, here I am doing those things. And, there is no drive to make it happen. Because I can't imagine any outcomes to any of it.

My head is getting emptied. Emptied of imagined outcomes, because outcomes are a very small way of seeing things. Emptied of ideas of what needs to be done. There is only the impulse to keep opening up to what I cannot know- but can only Be.

Simply put...I am a clean slate. And if writing on the wall happens- in the form of ideas, thoughts, imagined outcomes- it is my devotion to opening that erases them. WE are being erased- in the form of all those ideas- so that our most deepest sense of "I" evolves and grows up.

A Clean Slate is kept clean, so that a new language/life can be written. By keeping the slate clean, we are accessing the realm of pure potential....pure bubbly life. You can feel the absence in your being- deep within the nervous system. Keep the slate clean is pure devotion to what can write the new language. So, here we are.

Cloaks and Disguises

Several years ago, I had lost my day-job. Even though that job was my primary source of income,  the circumstances surrounding that job had made it impossible to stay. Life had brought down it's sword and severed the relationship, and there was nothing I could do.

It was one of those times that brought up a tremendous amount of fear. Not simply because I had lost my job, but because I knew in my heart that it was a perfect time to stand in the fire of not-knowing, and allow that fear to come to the surface.

My intuition told me that it was a perfect storm. I also knew that those perfect storms don't show up everyday, and that I needed to grab the opportunity to allow the storm to happen.

I had gotten a short house/pet-sitting gig, and it was cold. The shakiness of uncertainty was keenly felt, and I knew it to be a root of separation. I knew it needed to be uprooted. So, I let the storm come in...in the absolute terror of certain death. Ego knew that its fear of the unknowing was being exposed...and it really felt like I was going to die. It was imagining possible outcomes of homelessness and other vague scenarios, in which the worst could happen.

It didn't take long. Not really. Once I was aligned with the storm- the Divine intelligence that was the storm, and not feeding into the story of needing to feel safe- the shift happened in an instant. The storm blew in, and the disguise of needing security was lifted. And as I was standing there, looking out the window into the cold bleakness of grey skies, a shadowy cloak fell from my being, and disappeared as if it never was.

I knew what it was. Only a cloak, a hiding place. And without that cloak, the consciousness within the ego was free. The consciousness within that illusory ego-structure lost its need to know, because the future of possible outcomes left with the falling away of the cloak. 

The sense of "I" still remained, but there was a sense of liberation. I felt free from the disguise of fear and insecurity that was my entire view moments ago. 

It was a brilliantly clear and precise gift from the storm...to show my being what the separate ego structure really was- nothing but a cloak of fabulous illusion- while the consciousness within it merged back into the sea. Calm and unruffled, after the passing of the storm.