About Amma
her holiness sri mata amritanandamayi devi
For me, Amma is an enigma. She is a mystery that our mind can never fully comprehend, because she operates from a reality that our mind cannot fully understand. Yet, at the same time, she is the most intimate experience that we could ever have as human beings. She is our very own Self, so She knows us like no other person can ever know us. It is because of this intimate experience that we can open up to Her in ways that might never have been possible before.
Her name is Mata Amritanandamayi, and She is an incarnation of the Divine Mother; the source of all physical manifestation in the entire Universe. This is also something that the mind cannot comprehend, so don’t even try to understand it. Yet for those of us who have experienced Her mystery deeply and have been touched by Her grace, this statement cannot even begin to describe the power of Love She brings into this world.
Amma was born in a small rural fishing village in Kerala, South India. During her childhood, she exhibited many signs that revealed her profound connection with the Divine. Many of the local villagers believed Amma was crazy, because of how strange She behaved at times. Her family treated Her quite poorly, seeing Her behavior as an abnormality. People didn’t understand Her. But Amma never tried to dissuade them. She knew deeply that it was all part of God’s plan. But over the years, as Amma grew older, Her infinite love and acts of compassion toward those who were suffering made people more aware of her Divine nature. People naturally were attracted to Her, and soon some wanted to stay with Her. The unconditional love and deep wisdom emanating from just a simple fishing girl were extraordinary and captivating.
Today, Amma is a massive international force. She devotes herself night and day, every day, to the awakening of humanity and the easing of people’s suffering. She has manifested (from absolutely nothing) endless humanitarian efforts—projects that are unprecedented in their creative impact to relieve the suffering of all of Her children. Her charitable projects include:
Award-winning universities
Her 800-bed, super-specialty hospital that’s entirely free-of-charge for the poor
Building tens of thousands of homes for the homeless
Pensions for widows
Huge environmental projects
And the list goes on and on and on—all over the world.
For me and thousands of others, Amma is the Sat-Guru. She is the spiritual master who sees us. She sees our most authentic Self, and also sees how that Self is designed to manifest in the world. She sees our potential. The way Amma operates within us is very profound. She isn’t overly concerned about giving us little glimpses, or awakenings; although these glimpses can occur often in Her presence. Amma is going to the root cause of our separation. She is pulling out the “me” from our existence; that center individual that is so absorbed with itself. It is this central “me” that keeps us from knowing and living as the Self, our true essence. Amma knows that spiritual experiences are inspiring, yet she will not give them if she knows the ego will cling to them. She also will not give us big congratulations if we have an awakening, because that would only make the ego feel better about itself. The only time I remember her giving me any approval was when I had gone through intense and terrifying periods of surrender, when the ego had been let go of. She whispered “good girl” in my ear, and that was it—no big deal.
Amma sees the perfect jewel within us. She sees our potential, and She cuts and shapes us to bring out the brilliance of what She sees. This is not always an easy process. There may be times we feel we want to die, because the ego cannot see its survival in what it is going through. And that’s the good news! There have been many moments when I have seen that my process, the stripping away, is the only thing I truly want. I must live this life authentically to feel deeply connected to the love that guides it.
I have a lot of faith in my relationship with Amma. I have surrendered myself to that relationship, which is the relationship with the supreme Self, so that the process can unfold as profoundly as possible. Amma tells me that I will always have a Master, and I interpret this in many ways, one of which is that the process will never end. We are constantly being pushed to the edge of what we know. If we can cooperate with that, we will be led to our deepest potential, which is never fully realized, because it continually deepens as well. Consciousness is not a stagnant experience; it is also expanding, deepening, and exploring its own nature.
The work of a Sat-Guru, a true one, is much different from that of an ordinary spiritual teacher. Amma works so much deeper than anyone I have ever encountered, and I have sat with enough teachers to know the difference. Most of Amma’s teachings are shared in profound silence, as She transmits a powerful force of purifying love into those of us who are open enough to receive it.
Only those who are open and humble can receive this pure, Divine Love. It is the image of a chalice of nectar flowing into an empty cup. We must be empty of what we think we know. This is genuine spiritual humility. Divine love operates on a level that may not be immediately recognizable. We may not notice any changes in ourselves. We may be in a hurry to awaken, and we may want extraordinary spiritual experiences to convince ourselves of our advancement. If none of these experiences occur, we may become discouraged or think that we will never be free of our “stuff.” We may feel that it is all too difficult, and wonder, ‘What’s the point of all this?’
The Sat-guru knows what She is doing. She is rendering our ego harmless, so that it is out of the way and won’t corrupt our process. The ego wants to awaken, too, and often it will hold onto any “advancement” that it feels it is acquiring. This is very dangerous to our journey. Amma makes sure this doesn’t happen, and sometimes she is steadfast about it. She needs to be. This is why it is so essential to have a robust relationship with the Divine, whether it be in the form of a guru, spiritual teacher, or the formless presence that is beyond our own experience of ourselves. Our relationship must endure so that it can take us beyond what the ego thinks we need and want.
My gratitude for Amma is beyond words. I cannot imagine having the courage to undergo the level of surrender that was necessary without her precise guidance and loving support. Each time I am with Amma, She looks at me deeply, letting me know that She knows precisely what is happening. This allows me to recognize that it is exactly what I want, deep down within myself. I will always have Amma as my master. She is the Sat-Guru, and She is my Mother. She lives in my heart and breathes me. She is my True Self, reflecting radiant Love, and She belongs to us all.
Om Amriteshwaryai Namah!