Your Greatest Desire

It is so important to be absolutely clear about what we want. What we really want. I mean, many folks come to Satsang, or listen to spiritual stuff thinking that they want to know the Truth. They want to have a direct experience with the source of all Life. They want to know who and what they are. But it has been my experience that even though people say that they want the Truth, they really want something else. Something imagined.

To really know the Truth, and have it be integrated into our Life, we need to be ready to give up everything else. And the way we find ourselves capable of this is through our intense love for Truth. Truth will begin to expose all the ideas we have about what Truth is, and what awakening is. And sometimes the ways it does this isn't pretty. And much of the times it can really challenge our devotion to Truth, because it keeps shattering all our hopes around what awakening is going to give us. But through this shattering the fire of our devotion gets stronger and brighter. Truth asks us to be ready to give up our entire Life in order for us to allow it to live through us. And most folks have no idea what this means. Most folks think knowing Truth is going to give them some sort of spiritual holiday- something that will take away all their problems; all the bad parts of themselves that they don't like. But Truth might not take away any of the "bad" stuff. Not for awhile anyways. It just might make us live with it until we finally let go enough of our expectations from Truth. Because Truth doesn't give anything. It takes away everything that we are projecting onto Truth. And in doing so, only Truth remains, brilliant and clear, from our own intense Love for Truth. From this clarity we begin to live a balanced and harmonious life.

A friend made a gorgeous suggestion which I will take the liberty to pass on here. He said make a list of all the things that you desire in your life. Be honest about it. And I would suggest that you number which of the things are the most important down to the lesser important. Its essential that you are ruthlessly honest here. If you say you want the Truth, but then find yourself homeless and without money, where does your devotion to Truth go? So give yourself some time to look at this. If you are more devoted to your money than you are to Truth, then make sure you number that accordingly. Its perfectly alright. Just be honest about it.

Truth is going to test our devotion. Its going to take us to the brink of death. Its going to see if we are ready to let go of everything for it. If we feel the intense desire for the Infinite Reality to touch all aspects of our Life, its going to bring us face to face with death. And then its going to let us choose. And we will find Love leading us right into the fear of death. What remains is what continues on.

Intimacy with What Is

This moment is a powerful opportunity to know intimacy with the Divine. But are we aware of it? Are we looking for some nice awakened perspective so that we can control our experience with the Divine? Some nice place to land?

We all experience heartbreak, pain, uncertainty and fear. These are traits of being human. But what is our relationship with these human tendencies? Can we offer these to the Divine so that they become an entry point for something new?

The Infinite Reality is here, available for intimacy at all times. There is never a moment when it is not here. But many people are looking for a stronger experience of Truth by negating their own experience. They want a stronger version of Presence, or Silence. But what if the way to intimacy with the Infinite Reality was by sharing our human experience with this moment? What if we allowed the entire conscious field that surrounds us to enter into and have this human experience? What if this is the way the Divine dissolves all sense of separation that the human form may still experience?

Life is always ready to give us the richest version of Itself. In even the smallest, seemingly most insignificant moments there is an opportunity to allow the entirety of everything into our own Being. Our human design is meant for this. and when it is experienced deeply, our human design knows its function as a window for the Divine. The Source of everything.

By allowing this moment in, truly in, we are allowing the Source of everything to touch itself in this human form. And by doing so, this human form begins to be transformed. This is maturity. We are no longer looking for any identification with the Divine. We are allowing the Divine to use this vessel, awakening every cell to its own conscious nature.

What are these human bodies? Can we allow this moment to come in, so that all personal agendas are dissolved in the intimacy with What Is? Can we be patient enough, for how ever long we need, for this powerful intimacy to completely have its way with this human form? Can we get out of the way enough, so that the Divine may show this body, that anything is possible?

These are not just ideas or concepts. On the contrary, this intimacy dissolves all previous ideas or concepts. It is such an intimate encounter that there are no thoughts, or beliefs that could survive. This is what happens when the human form begins to be transformed. We begin to lose our limited perceptions because our brains and nervous systems are being changed. Altered. Expanded. Consciousness is using to human form to go beyond its previous experience. This is evolution.

The Great Removal

Many people on a spiritual path cause themselves much more difficulty than is necessary. And the primary way they do this is by believing or thinking that spiritual awakening is some sort of attainment, or that all experiences need to be good, conscious kinds of experiences. We don't want the kinds of experiences that expose our trance-like habits; the ones that don't seem to go away.

Spirituality, or enlightenment is not an attainment, or experience. It is a removal. A removal of you. You and all your projections onto the world, self and others. It is a removal of who it is that wants only nice characteristics, the one that wants to appear as a positive, spiritual person. Removal isn't something that is very pleasant when you are trying to get something, or be someone. But in order for the body/mind to know itself as a vessel for the infinite reality, there needs to be a great removal of all that is in the way.

Removal isn't done through understanding great non-dual teachings, or having sublime meditation experiences. Removal happens when we, as awareness, begin to see how a central interpreter creates everything we see.

Are we distorting this moment by any kind of interpretation of this moment? Are we only concerned with what our experience is? These are the kinds of questions that life is attempting to expose, so that we can see what it is that divides the unified field of consciousness. Because in true reality, there is no division.

Being removed will probably cause discord, struggle, resistance and pain. This is natural. The illusion of separation is all that is known, until the interpreter is completely removed. So even the removal will be happening through the interpreter. But there will be moments of reprieve; when new space and silence feel like a healing balm upon the nervous system. When the interpreter is temporarily absent, and this fresh moment fills the body/mind with wonder and awe. Allow these moments to inspire. Pay attention. Do not grasp these moments, because they are only the result of an ongoing removal. A great erasure of everything that is known. An absence of all that has gone before, so that the new can live.