When I first met Amma, I knew she knew me. Like we were the most intimate of friends. She knew everything. So, there was nothing to hide. What a relief! And over the decades that intimacy has deepened, and become unlike anything I could have imagined.
Now, She is here. Always. I sometimes experience a bit of sadness every now and then, because being in Her physical presence is so much fun, and I don't get to see Her as much. But as soon as remembrance of Amma happens, the Amma presence that is in my heart responds. She IS my heart. She breathes me. She guides me. I feel Her moving my fingers as I type. She is waking up my very nervous system to Her, so that any separation dissolves. She guides me towards certain people, and sometimes She guides me away. I have faith in this guidance, because it has nothing to do with the mind. The guidance is very quiet. Mind is watching all this guidance taking place without mind's interference, and so mind can rest. Mind rests within the Amma heart.
In fact, there is no "me" being guided. There is only this Amma/Life, living itself. The Infinite Reality, pure consciousness, taking over occupancy of the physical form. Quite delightful for the form, since this is what it was designed for. Its a perfect fit. Pure Love inhabiting the Lover. And the eyes look down at these hands in awe of it all.
Happy Birthday to the One Reality that never was born, and will never, ever die.