I Am the Door

I was one of those spiritual people that was afraid of Life. Most people are afraid of either life or death. For me, there was a great resistance to life- simply because of all the beliefs I had- what living a successful life meant, and all the imagined scary things that might happen.

So, since I was afraid- I blocked life. My fears kept the real potential of Life from happening. Yet, through Grace- I found myself loving God with all my being. My ideas about enlightenment were that I would merge with God, and God would take me away. There would be no more me- and no more fears- and all would be well.

I guess it was a good place to start. Fortunately, since I loved God- or Truth- with all my being, my spiritual evolution kept me on track. I found my devotion to this process becoming stronger than my fears about life. My devotion took me through my fears, thus dissolving them. My being began opening up to the realm of absolute not-knowing, and the potential within that realm. And even though the mind still tried to figure stuff out, my inner being began opening to the pure flow of potential.

There is now an intelligence that has awakened within my Being that IS the pure potential. My Being senses what it feels like to keep the doors open to Life. Fear is a product of mind these days- and only mind. The deep-seated fears of Life are no longer governing my nervous system. And if mind goes out- trying to figure out stuff- my Being simply pulls it back into its inner realm-where the doors are open to Life, and all that may come. My Being is the doorway, and it knows how to keep itself open to Life. 

Life is still an unknown- yet that is the adventure of it. While nothing is certain, Love and devotion to Life strengthens with each moment of alignment to Life. This is real faith. And It is not outside my being. It is through it.

Like Amma says, "Pure Love removes all fears." This opens the door- continuously wider and wider...

No me= No imagined outcomes

When we are in an authentic process of embodiment, there occurs a rather strange phenomenon- we begin to lose our projected future.

You see, all future is imagined. And it is imagined by a "me"- an individual that imagines a nice future, or imagines a possible scary future. This "me" holds onto hopes, and fears like a sailor holds onto the ship that is going down. And if that drive within the "me" is still strong enough, it will do whatever it takes to keep that ship afloat.

Because when we are living a life for Truth, our "me" is the ship. And all the "me's" hopes and imagined outcomes belong on the ship. And the ship is all we have ever known. On that ship, we've imagined all kinds of outcomes, and then thought that we needed to do something to make those outcomes a reality. We've believed we were the captain of that ship, and even though the ship is going down, we still believe only in that ship.

This is how all those old functions within our belief systems relate to this life. We still think it is our life- and that it needs to turn out a certain way, according to what we imagine. These are outcomes. And they are going away.

Everyone is going to go through this process differently, but it is essential that we begin to recognize what imagination is doing, and how the "me" is holding out for its hopes, or is afraid of Life because of its fears. It will continue to do so, until- through our devotion to Truth, we sense in ourselves the falseness of it. Anywhere the "me" is trying to land is only imagination at work.

Truth is pure potential, and by remaining in the fire of not-knowing- all those outcomes are being removed. We- as consciousness- are accessing the fertile ground of that potential. And our minds can never imagine what that can look like. This is a big clue. But we can sense when we are in that fertile ground, because we have let the ship go down, and felt ourselves as the vast sea. No-where to land, because the "person" that needs a place has simply gone away.

A Clean Slate

What a strange dance this is. For these past few months, there has been very little movement to put myself out there, other than the meetings that I have scheduled. Instead there is an intuitive knowing that the drive to "make happen," is being completely removed. And those drives, as a teacher, would be to write blogs, post things on social media, put out newsletters, etc.

Yet, here I am doing those things. And, there is no drive to make it happen. Because I can't imagine any outcomes to any of it.

My head is getting emptied. Emptied of imagined outcomes, because outcomes are a very small way of seeing things. Emptied of ideas of what needs to be done. There is only the impulse to keep opening up to what I cannot know- but can only Be.

Simply put...I am a clean slate. And if writing on the wall happens- in the form of ideas, thoughts, imagined outcomes- it is my devotion to opening that erases them. WE are being erased- in the form of all those ideas- so that our most deepest sense of "I" evolves and grows up.

A Clean Slate is kept clean, so that a new language/life can be written. By keeping the slate clean, we are accessing the realm of pure potential....pure bubbly life. You can feel the absence in your being- deep within the nervous system. Keep the slate clean is pure devotion to what can write the new language. So, here we are.